Let’s Get One Thing Straight

I guess I have gotten to the point in my life where people are going to drop the Big P word in front of me more often than not. Actually, people have been pestering me about babies for the past few years now. Almost 5 years come to think of it. Ew. That seems like a long time.
Regardless. I have been innundated with reasons to THINK that I am pregnant. I am very sensitive to smells naturally. There are some things that will just make me want to vomit when other people can’t smell a thing. I can even smell menstration, as gross as that sounds. (Insert Brick Tamblin joke here.) Recently, my sense of smell has been even MORE sensitive. It’s driving me crazy. I can’t wear perfume, I can hardly stand to smell Ben’s cologne, I can’t hardly stand the smell of my deoderant, which I’m scared to not use for fear that my own natural smell would disgust me even more.
Lots of people have been throwing it as a reason for really ridiculous things that happen in my life. Like, swollen feet and hunger.
Most recently was about a week ago when I suddenly started to hate the taste and smell of bacon. After I got over the initial shock, my first thought was pregnancy. I made the colossal mistake by telling Hubs. He wants kids, just not yet. We’re not in a place financially for kids to be a good idea. Last Friday after dinner with a friend, he drove me to the dollar store and made me buy 3 pregancy tests. You know, “in case one gives a false positive.” He’s so smart. Luckily, they were only a dollar each, and just as effective. Why would anyone ever pay more (like, $20!!) for something like that?
Anyways, each test came back negative. I’m not pregnant, which was simultaniously a major relief and slight disappointment. Let us continue by being rejected by grad schools.